the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
