You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize
