IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Randomize
