I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Randomize