'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
