Kiss
Puke
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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