I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I am never drinking with the goths again.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
