I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
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