so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
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