HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize