She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Will exercising make me less horny?
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