Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
