i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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