I just made out with a guy for $7.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize