I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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