Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
