i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
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