im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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