I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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