I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
