And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize