Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Randomize
