I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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