HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
