i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Randomize
