Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
