i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
