..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
