Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
