I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
