I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
