Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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