Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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