This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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