Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize
