Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Randomize