Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
