Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
