Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
