rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
