She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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