i think my mom watched the whole time
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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