My hair reeks of homosexuality.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
