i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
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