I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
