I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Randomize
