Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize
