based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
