i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
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