That's when you crack a 10am beer
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Randomize