just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
The power of my boobs compel you
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize