I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Randomize
