i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
In other news, I just burned my penis
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize